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Watching Tropic Thunder on the plane to Seattle I realized it:

Ian Brill used to blog on maximumfun.org. Bill Hader blogged on maximumfun.org (one post, but it counts). Bill Hader was in a few scenes of Tropic Thunder with Tom Cruise. Therefore, I am one degree away from one of the biggest (and perhaps looniest) movie stars in the world.

Take that a step farther, Tom Cruise was in A Few Good Men with...Kevin Bacon. That's right, I'm two degrees away from Kevin Bacon!

(Actually, I'm one degree away from Kevin Bacon but this way is cooler)

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I've only seen the first season of Heroes and decided that was enough for me. I've heard this third season is no good. But I just a still from an episode on Hulu.com. All it had was Malcolm McDowell and Robert Forester wearing tuxes and looking slightly confused.

You can't tell me this show is all bad. At least we have an idea for a spin-off.



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Hey guys, I have a comic coming out tomorrow. Zombie Tales #6. I feel I should say something here, even if I haven't been updating a lot. I have other on-line outlets for myself. I use LJ to make private notes to myself at this point. But hey, it's still useful for me. Check the book out, I hope you dig it. Toby cypress's art on my story is wonderful.

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My latest obsession is Roosevelt Franklin, the African-American Muppet from '70s Sesame Street. I discovered him through a Colbert Report sketch from last week. There, Roosevelt was said to be a borderline-racist embarrassment from an earlier era. But since finding his entry on the Muppets Wiki I don't think there's much credence to that. Yes, he has Buckwheat's hair and is colored, well, purple. But he was created by Matt Robinson, the first Gordon on the show. Robinson wanted images of Black Culture on the show that African-American kids could relate to and learn from. Listen to that alphabet sketch with Roosevelt and his mother. You could give a kid the regualr alphabet song or you could give them something funky and exciting. Roosevelt and his mother sound like Otis Redding and Carla Thomas there!

Here's another sketch, where Roosevelt teaches his students some African pride:

Stay strong Roose Frank!

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This was what I think about when I'm alone drinking:

The 1985 cast of Saturday Night Live was really weird. It was when Dennis Miller and Jon Lovitz got their start. But it also had Anthony Michael Hall, Robert Downey Jr., Randy Quaid and Joan Cusack. The idea that Iron Man and The Critic were working everyday trying to make gold out of a show guest hosted by Ron Reagan is bizarre. But it happened.

Man, I need a girlfriend.

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Thoughts on Hancock, which I actually just saw:

I haven't seen a film that just abandons its selling point with such velocity. For the promotion of the film we got pictures of Will Smith passed out drunk on benches and trailers all about this crazy bum/superhero. That's about thirty minutes of the movie. Then the filmmakers just decide a few weeks in jail will clean ol' Hancock up. That leaves room for hastily written villains and an attempt at mythology that just muddles everything up.

Why did they get rid of the premise of the film? It's not like they replaced it with anything worthwhile. We're told Hancock has tons of lawsuits against him and the city hates him. Why did he never see him in court? The story could have followed the route many alcoholics and drug addicts do. In and out of jail, failed stabs at rehab, people trying to help them but giving up in frustration. Except people can't give up on this guy because he could destroy the world if he wanted to. There's your drama.

By the very end of the movie Hancock is just another version of the sassy-but-not-scary Black man that Will Smith usually plays. If anything the movie is about taking a dirty guy and just cleaning him up to be a bland superhero in the most clumsy way possible.

An important rule of storytelling, when you come up with what you think is a good idea stick with it and exploit it every way you can to tell a thorough satisfying story. Half-assed shit like Hancock isn't going to cut it.

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How to entertain friends:

Molly: I'm a sucker for repitition.
your retardation is airborne
me: Yeah, the doctors warned me about that
Molly: I'm glad you at least got tested.
That's heartening.
me: Did I forget to tell you? I picked up some acting work on the side. I had a check-up for insurance reasons
Molly: Wait, what? Like porn?
me: "Jewish Poles in Asian Holes 23"
The number's really high because we're all so good at math
Sent at 10:19 PM on Saturday
Molly's new status message - " 'Jewish Poles in Asian Holes 23.' The number's really high because we're all so good at math." 10:21 PM
Molly: You're on a roll. :)
me: I've got a gift
Molly: It's a shame I never bothered to keep track of my status messages. I could make a best-of list.
You have many gifts, dear.
Sent at 10:23 PM on Saturday
me: Well, they didn't cast me in the second-highest selling Hebraic/Asian porn series for my timeliness
Molly: ha!
What the the first-highest selling?
me: Oy, Me So Horny